Dwayne Johnson has gazed into the eyes of his own wax visage, and he doesn’t like what he sees.
Over the weekend, the Musee Grevin in Paris’ wax version of The Rock was loosed upon the world, and the world responded accordingly... mostly by pointing out how much Wax Rock looks like Mr. Clean, Vin Diesel, or any number of other bald, white men that are definitely not named Dwayne Johnson.
Now, at long last, Flesh Johnson has weighed in on the whole affair. In an Instagram post today, the actor reposted a video in which comedian James Andre Jefferson Jr. roasted the shit out of the statue (to use a technical term).
“You know Black ass Samoan The Rock? They turned the rock into a pebble,” Jefferson said among other insults. “It looks like The Rock ain’t never seen the sun a day in his life... You made The Rock look like David Beckham. It looks like The Rock is going to be a part of the royal family. Did y’all even Google him?”
“I knew my boy @jamesjeffersonj had this Rock wax statue in his roasting crosshairs,” Johnson replied in his post, before offering an artistic critique of his own: “For the record, I’m going to have my team reach out to our friends at Grevin Museum, in Paris France so we can work at ‘updating’ my wax figure here with some important details and improvements- starting with my skin color. And next time I’m in Paris, I’ll stop in and have a drink with myself”.
Still, even if the museum does make the suggested alterations, it’s hard to imagine this vision of The Rock ever resembling anything other than a pretty smug gym teacher or dad at the barbecue. It might just be better (if a little horrifying mid-process) to melt the whole thing down and start from scratch.